What… the… frak…?

Posted on February 17, 2012


Read this story.  Seriously.  Read it.

Okay, now take a moment to let out the anger, the rage, the pure, unadulterated insanity.

Still not satisfied?  Cause I’m not either.  The sheer stupidity of people is amazing.  This is why we should have parenting laws.

Okay, no, not really, becuase I don’t trust that our society will allow me to raise my child the way I intend to.  But you’d think there should be some limits.  Oh wait, there are: when a parent is abusive to a child, the child is taken away.  That parent has lost the right to be a parent.  Maybe the same should apply with underage drinking?

For those who didn’t bother to read the article, I’ll summarize: a new reporter has been working with police in her area to cover underage drinking.  They monitored stores and observed a lot of teenage customers buying alcohol (the clerks didn’t ask for ID).  They busted parties where underage drinking took place and detained or arrested offenders.  All of this was on tape, too, and the reporter was present to question individuals.  Then it was put on TV.

The problem isn’t that kids are drinking when they’re not allowed to.  It’s not even that stores are letting them buy alcohol (although that is a concern).  The real problem is that these teenagers’ parents are letting them get away with it.  No, scratch that: they’re encouraging it!

“One of the most memorable things, was at an underage drinking party that was busted by police, one of the parents showed up to collect his son and he said right in front of police, ‘Why didn’t you run?'”

Here’s my question: why didn’t the police arrest the father for telling his son to break the law?  I’m sure there’s a legal term for that sort of thing…

Here’s another piece of insanity:

“McCarren said the parents she’s encountered at the busts with police have threatened to sue police and her news station.”

… what?  Okay, at this point I really wish I could talk to one of these parents.  I figure the conversation would go like this:

  • Me: Why do you want to sue the police?
  • Parent: Because they arrested my son.
  • Me: Wasn’t your son drinking?
  • Parent: Yes, but he was at home.
  • Me: Is your son underage?
  • Parent: Yeah, he’s 17, but I was home and I took the keys from him and his friends.
  • Me: Isn’t drinking at 17 illegal.
  • Parent: Look, you’re not…
  • Me: Here’s some advise, just a thought about how to handle the police.  Go to the police station, turn around, walk across the street and go fuck yourself.

There might be physical contact involved after that point.

Really, though, I understand the situation.  I’m from Wisconsin.  We have a tradition of this sort of behavior.  In fact, for us it’s legal (on private, non alcohol-serving premises, with parental consent).  In my personal experience, however, parents in Wisconsin are responsible enough to keep these parties small, and to have enough adults present that they can monitor their kids’ activities.  More to the point, though, Washington, DC, is not on this list!  Which means those parents threatening to sue the police are wrong.  They should lose the case.  And they should be publicly branded, preferably with a large letter “A,” for alcoholic.

And asshole.  Because that’s what they are…